Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
