We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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