this just has baby written all over it
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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