i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
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