She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
