just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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