it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
