We're facebook friends in real life
I will die if light touches me.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Randomize
