I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
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