this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
