Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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