Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
