well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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