tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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