Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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