woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
