Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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