she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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