So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
