do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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