so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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