I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
