Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
