My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
