Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
