help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
