I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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