we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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