Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
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