I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
