I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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