We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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