Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Randomize
