Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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