Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
