Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
