THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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