i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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