Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
