Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
