Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
