I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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