Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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