Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
what day is it and did you see me today?
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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