After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
