I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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