Say something about gay babies.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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