just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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