When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
