Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
